Random Colourful Commentary

Billiards: for defying the age (in golf), having courage to walk when clubs refuse to give out carts, overall good sport and fabulous 19th tee guy. Furthermore, he is my partner.

Steamer: Good player, very good sportsman. Helps out a lot with the tour. Always joins in the after game activities.

Cuba: Very good player and always a good guy to play with. For a newbie, he is very active with the tour. Always joins the after game activities and has contributed well by supplying 3-star prizes on numerous occasions.

Cuba: always helpful and encouraging, contributes with gifts to the 3-stars at most events.

Kricket: contributes to making the tour a classy event, always competing hard and trying his best.

Suds: with his mild manner always highest sportsmanship about the other participants and a fierce competitor at all events.

Grumpy: That's what friends are for? On points I don't think any other nominees will have fewer and in golf that makes him #1. Earnings click the header twice and who's on top - Grumpy. 2 for 2! Which near-rookie Slammer knows more Slammers names (both nics and alias) than - Grumpy! I'll bet he even beats the Commish. Sportsmanship - no one gives five bucks away like Grumpy, no one can card a 120 with a smile like Grumpy. Do you know anyone who has more fun playing golf than Grumpy and after 10 years of it I still can't figure out why - rumour has it he's taking lessons over the winter - his nic may be "Grumpier" next season. 53 events and doggie master or skins master at many of them. In the thick of things at the EG Club Champ (organizing that is - not contending). Ranked 56 with a scoring median of 106 (obviously there’s a problem with the database). Post-game participation, humor, general contributions to the success of the Tour, volume of quality quotables his record speaks for it's self. He's even "green" and we all know how important that is these days - green Slammer shirt to match his green plus-fours and ugly green toque (where on earth did he get that) and a picture of him huggin a tree on the Slammer awards page except he's wearing orange - go figure.

Cuba: If this guy doesn't’t get rookie of the year I'd like to meet the one who does. Alas we don't get to vote for Rookie of the year. If he does then I withdraw my nomination - kidding but not really - you got to spread the winning around. 8th overall, 48 events since July (obviously the PI business is not that good in Ottawa), 178 points and 168 bones, hanging to the end at every outing, couldn't find a nicer guy to play a round of golf with - Cuba for Preston Cup '09.

Well Iron Maiden and KidsClub are former winners and I can't find anything that says they can't win twice and I certainly didn't play enough golf with them this year.

My next nominee is questionable as well as he is employed by the Slammer Tour - no written rules about that either. But that said my third nominee goes to Malone. This guy is good on the course and with the mic. Always smiling, getting us into Rideau View, what more could you ask for?

Ticklar: Everyone knows him because he plays so many damn rounds! Played some amazing rounds of golf this year. Quotables galore. Easy going. Won several Slammer titles this year. He loves the Slammer Tour.

ProZee: Played some amazing golf this year. B-division champ, father and son champ. Does a great job as a SkinMaster.

Grumpy: The most un-grumpy guy on the tour. Full of energy. Very good sport.

ParBreaker: Best of the lot in skills. But he should smile a lot more. Grumpy and Wilfred are good fun: wish they took fewer strokes!

Grumpy: He has done so much for the tour including volunteer hours and donations.

ProZee: Again another one who has done a lot and he has balls.

Rulz: He is the spirit of the ST and hasn't won something for a while.

Well after taking a look at the stats and adhering to my own principle of not having the same person win SOY two years in a row (though it's hard to ignore IM's contribution to the Tour), I nominate Malone. He's got the Eagle crown wrapped up, top ten in skins, great scoring median of course, and right up there in earnings. And he's done this with only about a third of the events of Ticklar. I can't say much about his chitchat during the round as I've never played him, but he always seems in good humour even if he hasn't had a good day. And I know that he's done a lot of work for the Tour behind the scenes. So I think he deserves my vote.

IronMaiden: Reasons being, the creation of the "doggie-lope", (envelope for collection of skins and dogs money), "Doggie Leash", for measuring the dogs. Sportsmanship amazing; attendance - 67 events and counting; points - 164 (first girl in top 10); Ranking - made it to #2 (highest for a girl); winning percentage - increasing all summer; team performance; winning record in all team events (Commish's Cup, Cornwall Open, Greensmere Challenge); after-game participation - always one of last to leave - rye not beer; general contributions to the success of the Tour; if not OC always volunteers for skins or dogs; she's too nice, unless it's PizzaMan; volume of quality quotables - always puts her foot in her mouth.

Ticklar: 100 events?! Enough said.

Grumpy: Always volunteering, always promoting the tour, always hear him.

IronMaiden: Great OC, lots of fun to be in the same group with, plays a steady and improving game.

Wilfred: Fun player, steady.

Tickler: Fine player, great personality.

Grumpy: He brings so much spark and life into the Tour and is way up there on the 10 criteria.

KidsClub: Need to vote for myself since I think I do a great job and rank high on the 10.

Rulz: The most neglected guy on tour that contributes so very very much.

Grumpy is my second choice now… Chef is my first for one simple reason… Chef respects his competition no matter who that happens to be. He also takes defeat very well and is most likely to buy you a beer if and when he beats you.

If I had to pick one slammer to be on my team in any event where winning was important it would be CHEF! But I would have a chiropractor travel with us…

Grumpy gets second.

Third goes to ProZee.

Grumpy, ProZee and Wilfred... Grumpy and Wilfred are rookies who as far as I can see have entered into the Tour with enthusiasm and a willingness to help out (i.e. as doggie/skin master, etc.) obviously neither will likely ever be A golfers but love the game and have a positive attitude win or lose... ProZee is clearly a dedicated Slammer, serious about improving his game and a helpful, steady hand as OC.

ProZee: Gracious loser,humble winner, very good player and terrific Slammer tour representative. He exemplifies good sportsmanship and camaraderie on and of the course.

Ticklar: Trevino Clone, game galore and humour too. Takes as well as he gives. Makes everyone feel welcome in his foursome. Would be a worthy two-time recipient of the award.

Kricket: Who embodies the spirit and joy of the game more? He makes every event better by being there.

Steamer: Great OC and always helping out with skins and dogs. At every big event we have, you can find Steamer crunching the numbers while everyone else is enjoying dinner... and he's not getting paid (for skins). He bleeds Slammer orange! We'll all miss him next year when he's at Out of the way. Did I hear a "Steam whistle blow"?

ProZee: Big time Slammer, does a great job with OC duties and always helping out with skins and Dogs. He's a B player making a great charge to become an A player.

ZenGirl!

IronMaiden: Always working for the tour,always upbeat,just a pleasure to be around (and she plays a pretty good game).

ProZee: Again OC,dogs,skins, when he plays he is always involved in the WORK side as well. Plays a good game and never ducks a game against guys not as good (me for example). He always goes out of his way to praise lesser players when they do well.

Grumpy: Not an A player But seems to be a class A team player when it comes to helping out and promoting the tour.

My vote is for the Grumpster for following reasons: bundle of energy & enthusiasm; always ready to help; always goes the extra mile in anything he does; good sport, always a smile and positive attitude, even when he hits a rock with his club! He has really contributed to the common good of EG and Slammer Tour this year.

Well for me anyway – this is no contest. It is time to have the first ever two time winner. But before I voted, I went to the dictionary to look up Preston Cup. There it was – a picture of IronMaiden. Looking at the criteria, which I personally can’t agree with, she is ALL of it. The one criteria where she may NOT excel is winning percentage, but let us remember that she keeps putting targets on her back after her upsets. I find it hard imagining anybody wrestling this award from her.

Cuba: He is always willing to be the chauffeur, provides prizes, and when it was suggested that he be moved up a division for the club championships, he shrugged his shoulders and played along. Today, he is the current #1, and everybody that I talk to about him, suggests that he is great to play with.

Malone has an air about him that seems to not go along with the “A” classers. Always willing to go the extra, even when he has a big match, continues to laugh in the clubhouse, even when we are laughing at him. To watch him scurry and run on the course, to help the newbie or to set up the event, is a pleasure.

2009 Slammer of the Year GRUMPY! Sportsmanship – Anyone who prepays his matches has to be a great sport. Attendance – As long as his driver was available and providing the Warden let him out on a day pass he would play, he also attended most of the social outings and trips. Points – Not really known as a point getter. Ranking – Still trying to figure out how to beat TJ to crack the top 10. Winning Percentage – Not! Team performance – A great team player, if he had a team that would take him he would be the captain! After-game participation (volume of beer is not a key issue) – Usually sticks around to clown it up. Humour – Very good sense of humour. General contributions to the success of the Tour – After taking a few events to figure it out he has become one of the best supporters and promoters of the tour, bringing new ideas and people and making a big contribution to its success. Volume of quality quotables – Has had some but I am guessing the best is yet to come.

CUBA: With 37 events to date under his belt, this rookie sure got into the swing of things... A great guy on and off the course, Cuba has an excellent win ratio of 64.9%, plays a great game, is in the top 10 for points and hit the top at #1! Add to this that he always brings prizes for the top 3 stars... Great stuff Cuba!

ZenGirl: ZenGirl is always a shining star at a Slammer event... she's had a great year participating in 27 events to date and her win percentage sits at 47%... up from 30% last season. As an OC, ZenGirl always delivers making an event fun for all. Plus, her quotables are so good.... but most can't be published!

GRUMPY: Always eager to be involved, this rookie loves to spread the word about the Slammer Tour and is certainly the volunteer of the year when it comes to taking on the Dogs and Skins at any event. His name is an oxymoron as he is certainly never grumpy.... on or off the course he is a pleasure.

Stevie Ray: Always hangs around and will chat with every other Slammer, great to play with, doesn't cheat and smells great.

Billiards: Biggest trooper of us all... great supporter of the tour and friendly with everyone. Smells great too.

Steamer: A clear devotion from Steamer ensures that anytime help is needed, he will be there. A first class gentlemen and a great friend to everyone.

PizzaMan: 50-plus events, one time number one and still beatable!

Grumpy: Great on-course attitude for a regular who has yet to break 100.

Cuba: All round good guy, very active and getting better with every swing.