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Event Sponsor
Metcalfe LoGo

Notables

  • Hacker & Juice defeat SunShine & Grumpy on the 13th hole, in the TC mixed to advance to the Final Four.
  • RipZone closes out SubPar on 15 to move on to the Sweet Sixteen of the TC "B".
  • 2 holes later {17th} DJD upsets Ticklar to become the fifth Slammer to advance to the Elite Eight in the TC "Open".
  • On the same hole, our last TC match of the day gives the victory to Rexall in the Super Senior over Smokie.
  • Honourable mention goes out to Ripper today. He only had 4 birdies {three good for skins}, and a dog {missed a second one by 2 ball widths}, good enough for 82 bones.
  • The only other winner of bones {besides Clang & Rexall} was Grumpy for his 10th doggie of the year - sorry Ripper. Thank you TanCo!
  • Sometimes the pre-first drive introductions inspire good golf, but sometimes ... Tick was introduced as a leader of many categories. His rankings in 11 stats that we count are 2-1-4-3-1-1-2-5-1-1-1, well today not only did he not play Ticklike, he was even seen doing a faux pas, by going back to the teebox after not being able to find a loss ball after 10 minutes {but he DID act like a leader and stay around for abuse in the 19th}.

Quotables

  • "We suck!"
  • "Why so negative?"
  • "I suck!"
  • and after so many negative comments, she said "I would love to golf at a nudes only golf course."
  • "In some strip clubs, we have to pay for stuff like this."
  • "A great afternoon spent with three fine gentlemen." "He only said that because he won." "Winners always say that!"
Event: Metcalfe
Wed Jul 20, 2011
Summary
I hate to talk about weather, because what can you do about it but try and prepare. Kids Club shows up with a cooler bag full of water bottles on ice. He distributed them to the field of 20. THANK YOU KC. There was panic as Hacker prepared for his TC Mixed match. His partner wasn't there yet, but if you know Juice, that was nothing abnormal. Mr Ugotta returned after a 22 month hiatus, but with a new name - welcome back Smokie, and read the notables to see that the new name comes with a new golfer. Then there was Happy and his dress code - see the first star notes for more. With fifty percent of the field ready to advance in the TCs off we went, led by DJD's drive - hasn't anybody hounded him enough to get a real name? Buckle in and get ready to see some ladder jumping, as today will produce 16 upsets in the 28 matches.

Stars
Happy
Well this other dwarf named Slammer, is famous for a few things on the tour. One of them is his gloves. Although he now wears golf gloves, apparently he used to play in other gloves. He wore some shorts today, that may have rivaled the clothing that had him warned in the past. Enough on dress, the other famous Happyism is his choice to not enter skins, and this time the option worked for him. Now onto golfing, Happy had the same score that he has 75% of the season. Today it was good enough to upset #5 Ticklar on the 15th, and #8 Burnsy on the 17th. The Ticklar upset was sweet, because during the introductions, OC mentioned that Tick had won 6 of their last 7 matches, the last one on Sept 18, 2007. Happy's other victory gave him a 3-0 record and will move him next event to the blues. Congrats Happy, your dog on #17 will provide 25 bones for alpaca food.
Clang
There is no truth to the rumour! I heard the reason that Clang was chosen as a star was because, he saved my ball from being a bad lie. Congratulations to our newest newlywed Slammer. Don't show your bride the welt from stopping that ball on the 13th tee. Clang, who I like to call clang had an upset sweep. He did it by the 13th. Yes it is true - he gets hit on his own tee-box by Grumpy's drive off of #12, and goes on to win the dog and eliminate all three opponents to post his best ever Slammer Tour round. Clang you are a better golfer as a married man. Toast to the newlyweds!
Rexall (We Remember) (r)
Rexall changed the spelling of his name immediately after his first event. It was wrecksall, and he sure does wreck them all. In this his fourth event, he did the exact same thing that he has always done. He wrecked them and once again went 3-0. His second bird (and skin worth 19 bones each) of the day, on #15 first had him upset Stevie Ray, and then Blue to move 77 steps up the rankings ladder. Two holes later he closed the newly named and improved Smokie, to advance to the Elite Eight of the Super Senior TC. Which slammer will be the first to hand this nicest guy his first blemish?
Onsite Coordinator
  • Grumpy
Stats
  • Attendance: 20
  • Scoring Average: 92
  • Birdie Average: 0.45
  • Course Rating: 7.5
  • Best aspects of course: seeing the cart girl so often today was neccessary
Kids
  • The Kids earned $23
Event Fees
  • ST Member: $40
  • EG Member: $33
  • EG Unl. Member: $28

UPSETS DEFENCES
Challenger Defender Hole Challenger Defender Hole
Papa Malone [C32] Sutty [C14] 14 SunShine [B47] Hacker [B1] 12
Rexall (We Remember) (r) [C18] Stevie Ray [C7] 15 Grumpy [D1] Hacker [B1] 12
Happy [B13] Ticklar [A3] 15 Ripzone [B17] Clang [A28] 13
Rexall (We Remember) (r) [C18] Blue [A12] 15 Bookie [C16] Clang [A28] 13
Smokie [C78] Blue [A12] 16 Sutty [C14] KidsClub [C5] 13
DJD (r) [A14] Ticklar [A3] 17 subpar [B45] Clang [A28] 13
Happy [B13] Burnsy [O3] 17 Grumpy [D1] Juice [A34] 14
Big Guy [D5] Sutty [C14] 18 SunShine [B47] Juice [A34] 14
subpar [B45] Ripzone [B17] 15
Big Guy [D5] KidsClub [C5] 15
Big Guy [D5] Papa Malone [C32] 15
Bookie [C16] Ripzone [B17] 16
Bookie [C16] subpar [B45] 16
DJD (r) [A14] Happy [B13] 16
Smokie [C78] Rexall (We Remember) (r) [C18] 17
Smokie [C78] Stevie Ray [C7] 18
Ticklar [A3] Burnsy [O3] 18
Papa Malone [C32] KidsClub [C5] 18
DJD (r) [A14] Burnsy [O3] 18
Stevie Ray [C7] Blue [A12] 18

INDIVIDUAL PLAYER STATS
Slammer Score Birds Eagles Dogs Bones Skins Bones Record Points
Clang 78 1 0 1 25 0 0 3-0-0 6
Happy 84 0 0 1 25 0 0 3-0-0 6
Rexall (We Remember) (r) 83 2 0 0 0 2 38 3-0-0 6
KidsClub 95 0 0 0 0 0 0 3-0-0 6
Ripzone 85 4 0 1 25 3 57 2-1-0 4
Hacker 87 1 0 0 0 0 0 2-0-0 4
Burnsy 88 0 0 0 0 0 0 2-1-0 4
Juice 89 0 0 0 0 0 0 2-0-0 4
Papa Malone 95 1 0 0 0 0 0 2-1-0 4
Smokie 90 0 0 0 0 0 0 1-1-1 3
DJD (r) 89 0 0 0 0 0 0 1-2-0 2
Blue 91 0 0 0 0 0 0 1-2-0 2
subpar 94 0 0 0 0 0 0 1-2-0 2
Big Guy 100 0 0 0 0 0 0 1-2-0 2
Stevie Ray 94 0 0 0 0 0 0 0-2-1 1
Grumpy 107 0 0 1 25 0 0 0-2-0 0
Ticklar 92 0 0 0 0 0 0 0-3-0 0
Bookie 96 0 0 0 0 0 0 0-3-0 0
SunShine 98 0 0 0 0 0 0 0-2-0 0
Sutty 102 0 0 0 0 0 0 0-3-0 0

SKINS
HOLE 1 2 3 4 5 6 7 8 9 OUT 10 11 12 13 14 15 16 17 18 IN TOTAL SKINS
PAR 4 4 4 4 3 5 3 4 4 35 5 4 4 3 4 5 4 3 5 37 72
Ripzone 5 6 5 6 3 6 2 5 6 44 7 5 3 4 5 6 3 4 4 41 85 3
Rexall (We Remember) (r) 6 5 6 5 3 6 4 5 4 44 6 3 4 3 4 4 5 3 7 39 83 2
Clang 3 4 4 5 3 6 3 4 5 37 5 5 5 3 4 6 4 3 6 41 78 0
Hacker 5 5 4 5 4 6 4 6 4 43 5 4 5 4 5 5 7 5 4 44 87 0
Burnsy 4 5 4 6 4 5 4 4 6 42 6 7 6 3 4 6 6 3 5 46 88 0
DJD (r) 6 5 5 5 3 5 3 5 5 42 7 5 6 3 5 6 5 4 6 47 89 0
Juice 7 5 5 6 4 6 3 6 5 47 6 4 5 3 4 6 6 3 5 42 89 0
Smokie 5 4 4 5 4 7 3 5 4 41 6 5 6 3 5 9 5 4 6 49 90 0
Blue 5 4 5 6 4 6 4 6 4 44 6 7 5 3 6 6 5 3 6 47 91 0
Ticklar 4 6 6 5 4 7 3 4 5 44 6 6 7 4 4 6 4 4 7 48 92 0
Stevie Ray 5 8 4 5 3 8 5 4 4 46 6 7 5 4 4 7 5 4 6 48 94 0
subpar 5 5 4 5 4 7 4 6 4 44 7 7 4 5 5 7 5 4 6 50 94 0
KidsClub 5 7 5 5 4 7 4 5 4 46 7 4 5 4 5 5 6 4 9 49 95 0
Papa Malone 3 6 4 6 5 8 5 5 4 46 6 5 5 4 4 6 6 4 9 49 95 0
Bookie 7 5 6 5 4 8 4 4 5 48 7 5 4 3 6 8 6 4 5 48 96 0
SunShine 6 7 6 6 5 8 4 4 5 51 5 5 6 3 6 7 4 4 7 47 98 0
Big Guy 5 7 6 5 6 6 3 5 6 49 6 5 7 4 6 7 5 4 7 51 100 0
Sutty 6 8 4 7 4 6 5 7 5 52 5 6 7 5 6 6 4 4 7 50 102 0
Grumpy 6 6 5 5 3 7 3 7 5 47 8 7 6 4 7 7 9 5 7 60 107 0
TOTAL 0 0 0 0 0 0 1 0 0 0 1 1 0 0 1 1 0 0 5
Legend E Eagle or Better B Birdie P Par G Bogey or Greater C Cut-off birdie

PLAYER MATCHES
HOLE 1 2 3 4 5 6 7 8 9 10 11 12 13 14 15 16 17 18
1U 2U 2U 2U 3U 4U 5U 6U 5U 6U 7U 6U 7U - - - - -
3 4 4 5 3 6 3 4 5 5 5 5 3 - - - - -
5 5 4 5 4 7 4 6 4 7 7 4 5 - - - - -
- - - - -
RESULT: Clang wins 7 and 5 Start match at hole:
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