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Metcalfe LoGo

Notables

  • Notable ONE – there were two TC matches. Both were in the D division, and the FINAL FOUR played in one foursome. The goal was to also play the final at the same time. However on the first tee, it was decided that we would NOT do that. AngryBird took down the old wily veteran Kricket 3 and 2 to move onto the final. However he will have to wait as Gazzif & Grumpy couldn’t settle anything after 18 and will play another match soon.
  • Notable TWO - nobody was TPed in this event. I forgot to ask about the hole in one club, therefore nobody entered it.
  • Notable THREE A - Professor played in his first event of the season, and the last one was 61 weeks ago.
  • Notable THREE B – Charlie, after a very full rookie season in 2011, was out for his fourth time since.
  • Notable THREE C – NikeMom, returned for her first event in 59 weeks. Amazingly she had 12 bogeys, and we all know that bogey golf makes you a B/C class, as her C score today indicated. Ask her next time that you see her and she will explain the next name on this list
  • Notable THREE D – Biscuit O’Shumka, excluding the opener, is back in a regular Slammer event, and shoots his better ever Tour score – a C score due to no eights, and four pars.
  • Notable THREE E – Kanata’s first Slammer event, that wasn’t a TC match since 2009. He carded two pars and ten bogies to also have a C score.
  • Notable THREE F – LuvLife was back, and had her best Slammer round with only three eights and 8 bogeys.
  • Notable THREE G – MsDeamor played in her first game at home that wasn’t with her TC Mixed partner Stevie Ray. Her 4 bogeys and 12 doubles made this her best day.
  • Notable THREE H – Kookie came out to play her first ever Slammer eighteen on ‘home soil’.
  • Notable FOUR – rules … we had a nine on a scorecard today, had some discussion about all whiffs have to count, and that there are NEVER mulligans allowed, lost balls – when to declare or not, and the moving back to drop your ball, keeping the flag in a straight line.
  • Notable FIVE - Thank you Bubba for collecting the bones, and the doggie balls. Also for making your report [and the little trickery that you used}. Keep up the good work and maybe Culligan Water will have to make you a full spokesman.
  • Notable SIX - Todays Dynamic Physio & Chiro report was brought to you by Kookie. We usually say that cookies were brought by ... Today she offered to write the skins on the sheet as they entered. Not only did she enter them, once the audit of the sheet was done, and no errors detected, she decided to give the report. Kookie even shocked some of the old faithful with her "none of these guys are good." Like Bubba she threw in a little trickery of her own, when she skipped hole ten.
  • FINAL NOTABLE - BigGuy enters this restricted event as the highest ranked Slammer and successfully defends., therefore he goes home still tops. Today he is undefeated and continues that strong play {since returning from injury sustained during the Commish Cup), having gone 5-1-2 in his last three events.

Quotables

  • "Is that a crane, blue heron, or a polar bear?"
  • "There doesn't look like there is a lot of interference on that green." "That is because GoTee's doggie ball isn't in the way." "Nobody's doggie ball is there!"
  • "Is that the big one that you want?"
  • "Grumpy's group is slow. They are holding us up!"
  • “I won two hard fought matches today. I took KidsClub's ranking, gaining about 4 positions and yet because of others coming in over the top, I end up behind where I started. Ya gotta love the crazy game for what it is because there sure are a lot of wrinkles eh?”
Event: Metcalfe
Wed Aug 20, 2014
Summary
Well the event is in the books and by all counts it is a success. Do you think that those D classers are the reason for any pace issues on the Tour? Well today, seventeen of them walked the 18 holes of Metcalfe, and all under 4 hours 15 minutes. I know that scores don’t matter, but in an event that had many people return for the first time in a long time and mention that they would be back, I suggest that you have a closer look and see the relative closeness – and how there was only one score higher than 107 {a decent D scoring median}. This event posted a lot of personal bests.

Stars
Kaki
WOW! Who is this new Kaki? Her first - wait a minute, there is a list! For the first time in her fairly short Slammer career {this was her 11th event}, Kaki goes 3-0. In fact the last time that she had two wins, one was a DQ and the other was a DNF. Her first time that she had two wins – her opponents gave up a total of 21 Slammie Max 8s. Today she first took care to grab the target that was available to this foursome. She upset Kookie – they shook hands after the 12th, and Kaki moved up 34 rungs on the Slammer ladder. Three holes later she avenged her sole loss to MsDemeanor – and now they will need a rubber match. Speaking of rubber matches, Kaki made it two in a row vs LuvLife, on the 16th, bringing her career record to 2-1 against her. Were there other firsts for Kaki today? How about that birdie on hole ten? Yes it was her first birdie. It was also the first time that she won bones ($28) when that birdie was good for her first skin. During this match – she only had two 8s {I wish that I could say that!}. Match play has dropped her score by five strokes for the second straight event. The way that our scoring median works - she also improved that by four with this event. Maybe she won’t even qualify for the D event next time. I wonder if we should do a commercial for that guy giving you lessons. NO! it is not RipZone.
AngryBird
Angry Bird was announced as a third star at the event. However after all of the auditing gets complete – it shows that he actually went 3-0. Earlier we had mentioned two wins and a draw with Gazzif. Maybe you would have been considered ahead of Kaki as number one today, hoever, when you didn’t even know how your matches ended up – and we had to adjust after the audit, I want to ensure that next time you take a minute to look. Felicitations for advancing to the FINAL FOUR of your TC division. Not only did you beat Kricket to advance, you also defeated Gazzif and Grumpy with your par on 18. That win over Grumpy moved you up 76 steps on the Slammer ranking ladder.
Knickers
This is another event with Knickers as a star. There are many conversations about possible name changes. He can’t have the Enigma {which he should with his games jumping back and forth between the Bs and the Cs and the Ds}. Some think that his name should be Babylon. So why should he have a star today? Undefeated with two tough matches, he had another dog, another bird, and yes another skin. That amounts to 58 bones, which doubles the amount that the next four Slammers {in bones earnings} won today. He was introduced as having a birdie in every three events and betters that. He is also announced as being in a battle for the top D division winning %, and betters that BUT moves back into C. He continues his dominance over Kids Club and shakes his hand, after getting a par on 18. He remains undefeated over Bubba, bettering their last match draw with a victory this time. Sorry Knickers, not only are you right {see the last quotable}, but you also dropped one star notch since you left the course.
Onsite Coordinator
  • Grumpy
Stats
  • Attendance: 17
  • Scoring Average: 102
  • Birdie Average: 0.18
  • Course Rating: 7
  • Best aspects of course: Lots of washrooms state the five Slammettes.
Kids
  • The Kids earned $27
Event Fees
  • ST Member: $42
  • EG Member: $37
  • EG Unl. Member: $32

UPSETS DEFENCES
Challenger Defender Hole Challenger Defender Hole
Luvlife [D29] Kookie (r) [D19] 14 Kookie (r) [D19] Kaki [C66] 12
Kaki [C66] MsDemeanor (r) [C65] 15 Kookie (r) [D19] MsDemeanor (r) [C65] 14
AngryBird [C30] Kricket [B72] 16 Professor [D24] Charlie [C46] 16
Gazzif [D10] Kricket [B72] 17 Luvlife [D29] Kaki [C66] 16
Bubba [C29] KidsClub [C12] 17 Bubba [C29] Knickers [C15] 17
Luvlife [D29] MsDemeanor (r) [C65] 17 Biscuit Oshumka [C185] Kanata [D68] 18
Knickers [C15] KidsClub [C12] 18 NikeMom [B244] Kanata [D68] 18
Gazzif [D10] Grumpy [D2] 18
Kricket [B72] Grumpy [D2] 18
Grumpy [D2] AngryBird [C30] 18
Charlie [C46] Big Guy [D1] 18
Professor [D24] Big Guy [D1] 18
Biscuit Oshumka [C185] NikeMom [B244] 18
Gazzif [D10] AngryBird [C30] 18

INDIVIDUAL PLAYER STATS
Slammer Score Birds Eagles Dogs Bones Skins Bones Record Points
AngryBird 99 0 0 1 28 0 0 3-0-0 6
Kaki 101 1 0 0 0 1 28 3-0-0 6
Knickers 91 1 0 1 28 1 28 2-0-0 4
Luvlife 106 0 0 0 0 0 0 2-1-0 4
Kanata 95 0 0 0 0 0 0 1-0-1 3
NikeMom 96 0 0 0 0 0 0 1-0-1 3
Gazzif 101 0 0 0 0 0 0 1-1-1 3
Charlie 105 0 0 0 0 0 0 1-0-1 3
Big Guy 105 0 0 0 0 0 0 1-0-1 3
Bubba 98 1 0 0 0 1 28 1-1-0 2
Grumpy 101 0 0 0 0 0 0 0-1-2 2
MsDemeanor (r) 106 0 0 0 0 0 0 1-2-0 2
Kricket 104 0 0 1 28 0 0 0-2-1 1
Biscuit Oshumka 99 0 0 0 0 0 0 0-2-0 0
KidsClub 102 0 0 0 0 0 0 0-2-0 0
Professor 107 0 0 0 0 0 0 0-2-0 0
Kookie (r) 123 0 0 0 0 0 0 0-3-0 0

SKINS
HOLE 1 2 3 4 5 6 7 8 9 OUT 10 11 12 13 14 15 16 17 18 IN TOTAL SKINS
PAR 4 4 4 4 3 5 3 4 4 35 5 4 4 3 4 5 4 3 5 37 72
Knickers 5 5 3 6 4 7 4 7 5 46 7 6 5 4 5 5 5 3 5 45 91 1
Bubba 8 5 5 6 5 4 4 7 6 50 6 7 5 3 4 5 6 4 8 48 98 1
Kaki 6 5 6 6 5 8 4 6 5 51 4 7 5 4 7 6 5 4 8 50 101 1
Kanata 5 5 5 6 4 7 6 5 5 48 5 5 6 4 4 7 5 4 7 47 95 0
NikeMom 5 5 5 5 4 7 4 5 5 45 7 6 5 4 6 7 6 4 6 51 96 0
AngryBird 6 5 5 7 3 8 4 8 4 50 6 5 7 4 4 6 6 6 5 49 99 0
Biscuit Oshumka 6 7 5 6 3 6 5 6 4 48 7 6 7 3 6 6 6 3 7 51 99 0
Gazzif 6 6 6 6 5 7 3 6 5 50 8 5 6 3 5 7 6 4 7 51 101 0
Grumpy 8 6 5 5 4 6 4 6 4 48 5 6 5 5 6 8 5 5 8 53 101 0
KidsClub 5 7 6 5 6 7 4 6 5 51 6 5 5 4 5 8 5 5 8 51 102 0
Kricket 7 6 5 6 4 8 4 6 7 53 8 6 5 3 4 7 6 5 7 51 104 0
Big Guy 7 5 6 5 3 8 4 5 6 49 8 7 7 4 6 7 7 4 6 56 105 0
Charlie 8 5 7 6 5 7 3 5 6 52 7 6 7 4 4 8 5 4 8 53 105 0
MsDemeanor (r) 6 5 6 6 5 8 5 6 7 54 6 6 6 5 6 7 5 5 6 52 106 0
Luvlife 8 5 5 7 4 8 4 6 6 53 6 5 7 4 6 8 6 4 7 53 106 0
Professor 7 5 4 7 4 9 4 6 5 51 6 6 8 6 5 8 6 4 7 56 107 0
Kookie (r) 6 8 8 6 4 8 8 7 8 63 8 8 6 4 7 8 7 4 8 60 123 0
TOTAL 0 0 1 0 0 1 0 0 0 1 0 0 0 0 0 0 0 0 3
Legend E Eagle or Better B Birdie P Par G Bogey or Greater C Cut-off birdie

PLAYER MATCHES
HOLE 1 2 3 4 5 6 7 8 9 10 11 12 13 14 15 16 17 18
1U 1U 2U 2U 3U 2U 2U 2U 3U 2U 3U 3U 2U 1U 1U 2U 3U -
5 5 3 6 4 7 4 7 5 7 6 5 4 5 5 5 3 -
8 5 5 6 5 4 4 7 6 6 7 5 3 4 5 6 4 -
-
RESULT: Knickers wins 3 and 1 Start match at hole:
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